Oprah: On Autism

Oprah has Autism as her topic for today. I'm going to carve out that hour from my schedule to watch the show and see what she has to present.

See, I've been struggling with Autism, or rather I've been struggling with my daughter Peanut's (NB) Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) lately. I have been really doing well dealing with her diagnosis and being an advocate for her, but the day before yesterday I just lost it. I was sitting in the hot tub with my husband, B., trying to relax, but I wound up sitting there whining and blubbering about how I felt like I couldn't handle Peanut's ASD. See, we've only had a diagnosis of ASD for the Peanut since February 2007. And we're still in that blinding snowstorm that is trying to sort out our emotions, find the best treatment options for Peanut, and be good parents (all at the same moment in time). It is quite overwhelming.

For example, it is like dealing with your taxes and all the government forms that go along with them every day, just the tax laws change daily, and sometimes hourly, and you aren't privy to those changes. Dealing with the emotions you feel as a parent with a child diagnosed with ASD is like: "here, things aren't the same as you expected, they've changed, I'm not going to tell you the changes, and if you screw up, well....that's just tough. You'll get a melt-down for a reward and you'll have to start from square one. Oh, yeah, and your deadline for everything to be dealt with just got shortened by an undisclosed amount of time. You'll have virtually no support from anyone, and, just for good measure, you'll need to beg, whine, wheedle, threaten and shout to get any services covered by your insurance--that is once you've jumped through the proverbial hoops to get the services in the first place. Tootles! Have fun!!!!"

But, to return to my original train of thought: I'm thrilled that Oprah is going to feature Autism. I've already emailed my family and friends about the upcoming show. I hope that some of them will watch. Maybe they'll get a more open understanding of why Peanut is the way she is, and realize that she's not being a 'bad girl' or that we're not 'rotten parents.' Peanut is just hard-wired differently and has a unique perception of the world that no one else has.